October 31, 2014

Florio Predicts Playoffs For Bengals

As we get closer to the opening weekend of the 2012 NFL Season, it’s time for the so-called “experts”  to give us with their final preseason predictions and prognostications.  These “personalities” give us their deep thoughts on who will win each division, who will secure the 4 wild cards, and ultimately who will face off in the coming Super Bowl.

This Nostradamus routine is utterly meaningless, and their prophecies are almost always wrong.  Talentless hacks that they are (like me only paid better) generally devise their expectations using little more than last year’s won-lost records with a heavy dose of their own personal biases.  

In my 30 years of observing the NFL, I’ve found that the Bengals are usually summarily ignored as a part of these annual rituals.  Why?  Well, usually they’re coming off a horrible year and they are not well-liked by the hackosphere as a whole. 

To be fair, the team hasn’t made back-to-back playoff appearances EVER, and they haven’t won a playoff game since I was in high school.

All that being said, I was shocked to note while reading PFT’s annual SWAG that their illustrious founder Mike Florio picked the Bengals to make the playoffs and win a game. 

I’ll pause a moment to allow you to let that sink in.

I usually look upon his posts with disdain as I’ve found him to often be nothing more than a Steeler apologist from West Virginia.  And a lawyer by trade.  Nonetheless, it was nice to see him go out on a limb like he did, especially since not one of his evil minions mentioned our boys in stripes though Tennessee, San Diego, Buffalo and Kansas City were all picked to make the postseason. 

You can see all their crystal balls (that doesn’t sound right) by clicking here.

Florio has the Bengals securing the first wildcard, and beating the Titans in Tennessee in the wildcard round.  That’s right, no Texans in the AFC South.  Unfortunately, he sees the Bengals running into the Patriots in the divisional round and stopping there.  At least he sees them in it.

Even more delicious is that he sees the Steelers missing the playoffs completely.  He has Baltimore winning the division and the Chiefs (yes, the Chiefs) getting the last wild card.  It may not be worth the megabytes it was written on, but it was nice to see anyway.

Thanks, counselor.